I should… two words that preceding a sentence (or a whole slew of sentences) have the power to make you want to blow your brains out. For example, waking up at noon on occasion will trigger an overwhelming sense of guilt because I should have been up earlier to get through more of my exceedingly depressing tasks, i.e. writing cover letters that are destined to never be read and orbit the internet for eternity. Once I’m up I should get at least halfway down my infamous list by dinner so that I feel productive and like I haven’t wasted yet another day gasping at someone from high school’s wedding album on Facebook (it is designed for us to creep!), experimenting in the kitchen with tofu (my most favorite method of procrastination) and watching an entire disc of Sex and the City Season 4 (my newest guilty pleasure).
The point is, by the end of the day I’m lucky if I’ve crossed even a couple of items off my list. A part of me wants to blame my lethargic lifestyle on low iron, considering I’ve been a vegetarian for almost a decade now. Then again, why blame myself when I can blame “I should” for causing me to stress to the point of becoming paralyzed with anxiety. These one-syllabled words build pressure. They most certainly do not allow you to enjoy anything else you may be partaking in because they hang at the back of your mind constantly reminding you of your unfinished business.
So here’s the solution… you tear this phrase right out of your vocabulary and substitute it for something like, “It would be more productive if…” or “I could finish this now and have more time to…”. I feel less stressed already!
Thank you to the friend who diagnosed me with the “I should” syndrome… you know who you are. Here’s hoping this cures a few others. 😉