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Narrative nonfiction, Reflections

Honey Oats

Where do nerves come from and how do you shut them off?

There’s nothing to be nervous about, you’ve discussed this with yourself plenty of times that morning. You don’t listen! The butterflies roam around freely. Shaking, gulping air in slowly, people-watching… none of it helps while you’re sitting there waiting to be called in for your audition. Finally, you hear your name, walk in and wobble over to the spot where you are requested to stand… you, along with three others. This reminds you of how they used to line up people before shooting them. And at that moment, you almost wish someone would. Of course you are selected to begin the painful process by spitting out the first line into the camera. And on the third try, you get it right on! Time to switch; this time, you’re the one that has to grin into the camera and put a spoonful of the delicious cereal into your mouth. In a desperate attempt to redeem yourself, you decide to flash them your best smile. And you hold it there for an unnatural amount of time, before tossing a spoonful of the dry, crunchy stuff into your mouth. Once you’re done chewing, you go back to exposing your big white teeth. They yell, “Thank you” and your audition is officially over.

Yes, this happened to me. And yes, once I had left the audition I was kicking myself thinking about the line I had managed to translate from English to gibberish on the first two takes. And then of course there was the creepy, static grin sprawled across my face for an uncomfortable amount of time. The experience was altogether horrifying. However, oddly enough I’m already looking forward to the next nerve-wrenching episode of “Heidi works towards fame”. I rather put myself out there and fail miserably, than not try anything at all for fear of failing. At the end of the day, the more experience you acquire, the better prepared you are to succeed. And one day you will!

And one day I will be the next George Stroumboulopoulos…you’ll see. 😉



About Little Miss Spanglish

Bright-eyed dreamer, set in her ways... enjoys working-out to slow jams. Hates being called by her full name by people close to her. Has never had a pet, yet has names picked out for her future fish, cat and Teacup pig (name of future dog still in the works). Loves receiving handwritten letters in the mail (long, handwritten messages in thoughtfully picked out cards also result in a smile). Will stare in disdain at her plate if it is inhabited by: brown rice, asparagus or beets (coming around on the beets). Finds skipping-down-a-sidewalk to be a lost art in adults... refuses to let that happen to her.


One thought on “Honey Oats

  1. Good for you for putting yourself out there!
    I’m curious, what were your lines??

    Posted by May Tran | August 14, 2012, 7:48 pm

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