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Narrative nonfiction

Quarter of a Century

That’s me. Twenty-five years old. Threw a masquerade birthday bash on Jan .6th. I was referred to as the “black swan” as I wore a ruffled black gown and pearl-studded mask. I don’t remember a single song I danced to. I do remember certain conversations, all masks/faces and bouncing around like a ping-pong ball from one group of friends to the other. I remember every drink that made its way to my lips:  a glass of chardonnay, a glass of sparkling wine, a shot of dark Malibu rum, a cranberry-vodka, a shot of vodka, a Jager Bomb and two Polar Bear shots. The after party consisted of Chinatown and lots of greasy goodness. Didn’t get to bed till about 6am.

The following night I was flying off to Mexico… only to be welcomed by a RUDE group of airport staff. One girl, while chewing gum in my face, asked me to lay my bag down and then proceeded to give me attitude when I didn’t lay it down on the side she had in mind. In Mexico, you’re expected to read people’s minds. Anyway, the staff at my resort was MUCH sweeter. They decorated your bed with animals they’d make out of towels: an elephant, a fish, what looked like a dinosaur, etc. The food at the buffet was delicious… it included a “Mexican Corner”, where I discovered these cheese-filled corn empanadas. A little guacamole, black beans and fresh salsa to top it off and suddenly my bikini was cutting off my circulation. I have to admit that although the food beats Cuban cuisine by far, Mexico’s beaches will never compare to Playa Esmeralda in Holguin or the beaches of Cayo Largo. The nightlife in Mexico though, UNFORGETTABLE! Coco Bongos: a combination of Vegas-style cabaret, Cirque du Soleil and Coyote Ugly. This club was wild! At one point I was pulled up on stage (located over top of the main bar) to dance with “Beetle Juice”.

In one week, I zip-lined, rappelled, swam in a “cenote” (an underwater cave), swam with turtles, danced on a bar, shopped on the Mexican version of Fifth Avenue and climbed to the top of a 44-feet pyramid in Coba. The last day of my vacation, I ventured on a ferry to Cozumel (an island across from Playa del Carmen)… turns out I get sea sick, VERY MUCH SO! There and back… oh, and did I mention it was viciously raining? So I returned to Playa with nothing in my stomach, dripping wet, dizzy, shaking from the cold and with my hands feeling numb. An ambulance was called from Senor Frog’s to check my blood pressure… how embarrassing.

SO, if you’re travelling to Mexico, remember to:

  • NEVER open your mouth in the shower (brush your teeth with the bottled stuff).
  • NEVER make phone calls from your hotel room (it’ll cost you about $1/minute).
  • Pack extra hair product, the humidity is merciless.

Happy travels!



About Little Miss Spanglish

Bright-eyed dreamer, set in her ways... enjoys working-out to slow jams. Hates being called by her full name by people close to her. Has never had a pet, yet has names picked out for her future fish, cat and Teacup pig (name of future dog still in the works). Loves receiving handwritten letters in the mail (long, handwritten messages in thoughtfully picked out cards also result in a smile). Will stare in disdain at her plate if it is inhabited by: brown rice, asparagus or beets (coming around on the beets). Finds skipping-down-a-sidewalk to be a lost art in adults... refuses to let that happen to her.


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