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Narrative nonfiction, Reflections

Frozen

Do you know what’s upsetting? That I just stood outside for 20 minutes in -15 weather waiting for a bus that didn’t bother to make it to the stop at it’s scheduled time. Furthermore, the gym is closing in half an hour… and the tardy bus has managed to RUIN my chances of working off even the most minimal amount of the calories I’ve accumulated from sitting at my desk all day and eating what I shouldn’t. Then again, all the shivering I’ve done on my snowy trek to and from the useless bus stop has probably taken care of that for me… so I suppose all is not lost.

I hate radio hosts who find it amusing to poke fun at the percentage of people who sign up for the gym at the beginning of the year (as a New Year’s resolution) and who only weeks later become fatty dropouts. Well you know what? Maybe they don’t have a car. Perhaps they had every intention of going but the closest fitness facility closes at 8:45pm, the buses are unreliable and IT’S BLOODY COLD! As a newly pledged dropout, I would like to extend a few words of advice to those who feel my pain: BUY A WORKOUT VIDEO. That’s the way all Canadians without access to a nearby gym should work up a sweat in the winter months. No having to worry about the sweaty guy next to you watching your wobbly bits with a disgusted look on his face as you run or about the Barbie doll on the other side of you in fashionable lululemon gear making you feel self-conscience about your crumpled old t-shirt and purple socks.

There you are working out in the comfort and warmth of your home with your very own sexy-as-heck personal trainer yelling at you to “Keep it up!” from your television. All of a sudden the phone rings… you pause the video and end up yapping with your girlfriend for 30 minutes about absolutely nothing. You hang up and decide that you’re hungry. You’ve already done about half the workout, so why not leave the rest for tomorrow? BECAUSE TOMORROW NEVER COMES! Tomorrow becomes today. Hence, you’ve just stopped working out. Congratulations, the chocolate you ate has happily grouped itself with the rest of the cellulite on your thighs and that croissant is now a part of that slowly but surely growing muffin top.

You know what? It’s winter, cover it with a sweater and go have some fun!

-LMS

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About Little Miss Spanglish

Bright-eyed dreamer, set in her ways... enjoys working-out to slow jams. Hates being called by her full name by people close to her. Has never had a pet, yet has names picked out for her future fish, cat and Teacup pig (name of future dog still in the works). Loves receiving handwritten letters in the mail (long, handwritten messages in thoughtfully picked out cards also result in a smile). Will stare in disdain at her plate if it is inhabited by: brown rice, asparagus or beets (coming around on the beets). Finds skipping-down-a-sidewalk to be a lost art in adults... refuses to let that happen to her.

Discussion

One thought on “Frozen

  1. Hahaha. Same routine every year

    Posted by Justin Lim | September 21, 2014, 3:11 pm

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