I’m sitting on the phone bantering back and forth with a guy who was born in 1988 (that’s a whole year younger than me). Three years ago, I was smitten by a half Puerto Rican, half Italian blend of male perfection who turned out to be a boos hound with a booty call contact list that would put the Yellow Pages to shame. So I turned my attention to his irritatingly sarcastic (but intriguing) sidekick – Cousin Dan. There was something about this guy… maybe because despite the fact he came across as the typical trying-to-get-lucky 20-something year old (complete with his intentionally cheesy come-ons, as to breed charm), there was an underlining maturity about him that superseded that of his much older cousin (and his much older cousin’s friends). It was the way he would exchange glances with me about the incredulous behaviour happening around us or the way he quietly observed until he not so quietly decided he needed to offer up an opinion. I often felt as though he tried to hide that side of him from the rest of the rowdy and the over-experienced.
Dan and I didn’t hang out for very long. Above all, he was still a man and my prudish ways eventually beat out his persistence… or so I thought. Years later (and exactly last week), as I sat primping in front of my bedroom mirror, my phone lit up with the words: Incoming Call – Dan. This unexpected surprise lured a smile to my face.
Turned out, Dan was on the rebound. Three-year relationship with an older woman who decided to call it quits because she felt they were on separate paths. She was his first love. I’ve always had a rule about dating younger men… don’t. It’s known that the maturity of a male is significantly behind that of a female, which explains why over the years I have been swayed to adopt the motto, “the older, the better” as my personal mantra. I’ll tell you ladies, two 30-year olds later and I’m starting to re-think my preferred choice. I’ve met a lot of slightly younger guys (a few months, a year, maybe even two years younger), who have impressed me with how together they are. Most of them know what they want in life, have some sort of plan and are okay with the notion of monogamy. Let’s not get carried away here, in no way am I condoning “cougar status” (then again, I don’t judge). What I am saying is that maybe these older guys are single for a reason. Perhaps once upon a time they were these fairly sweet young put-together guys, who then some girl decided to ruin.
As for Dan, he’s still the same goofy sardonic guy that will purposely push all my buttons and say just about anything to get a rise out of me. However, his wit is now accompanied by a cloud of cynicism… but that’s what friends are for, to make sure the good ones aren’t wounded beyond repair. In other words, I’m protecting myself because these happen to be the kinds of tainted fellows I end up dating.
So gals, get ‘em while they’re still sweet and help keep ‘em that way! 😉